Beyond Marriage – Why We Should Not Walk Alone

Word-Of-The-Day:  “It is not good for man to be alone…”  (Genesis 2:18a)

On a Christian blog site on a social media platform, I read a comment that questioned the importance of marriage, and if marriage specifically was to satisfy the emotion of lust. Certainly part of marriage is to do just that; in the proper order the intimate emotion of lust should follow the binding emotion of love we have for our spouse, to be satisfied after the bonds of marriage are tied between the man and the woman before God and by Him.

But marriage goes beyond simply the satisfaction of lust, or at least it should. While lust may be the initial spark of an attraction between two people, it can never be the only thing that binds two people together. Marriage is also a commitment between the couple that they are bound together through their lives, the joys and the burdens to be shared between the two, as equal as possible. That burden may sometimes need to be unequal in its share; one spouse becomes very ill, for example, and the other must carry the load of the two.

Marriage is a sharing of resources; a couple doesn’t need two separate homes, or two separate pantries of food. It is not supposed to be ‘my stuff’ vs. ‘your stuff’ but it should be ‘our stuff’, items that we both use for either individual or family needs. Worshipping God should be an action both as a team and as individuals.

Realize there are things that will be individually separated, as spouses may not share the hobbies, secular passions, or fashions the other has. Honestly, I don’t want to share my toothbrush with my spouse, nor do I want to use hers (that would be weird). As stated above, some of our worship of God, is individually focused as much as it needs to be something done together. My spouse as ‘alone time’ with God, as do I. But we also have time in which we pray and worship Him together.

The biggest thing marriage is for is companionship, the sharing of time and experiences with each other. In the context as Genesis 2:18 was written, God is speaking about Adam; Adam was alone in Eden and could not share anything he experienced with anyone else, because there was no one else.  Adam had God (he actually had Jesus, as the physical manifestation of God) to talk to, but God knew Adam needed a peer as a companion.

For example, your Mom and/or Dad are good to hang out with, get advice from, etc. but it would be awkward for most of us to ‘pal around’ with our parents.  Likewise it was the same for Adam, so God created Eve so Adam has some he could relate to, have intimacy with, and to also help him (or perhaps as is the case for many married men today, supervise him) in doing work. After that, Adam and Eve could share their time together.

Adam and Eve could share experiences they did together; unfortunately one experience led to the initial sin that led to man’s fall from Grace. After Genesis 3, they shared in having children, both the blessings and the heartaches of seeing one child killed (Abel) and the other forced to leave them as a murderer (Cain). They later were consoled with Seth, and together they lived through and shared each of these experiences – the tragic and the joyous ones – just as married couples, tied together with God, do today.

In a broader context beyond marriage, we know it is also not good for us to be alone without interaction with others.  For many folks, they go to work not just to earn a living but to socially interact with others on a daily basis.  Many of us (even with our wives and perhaps children in the house with us) at times have little contact with others outside of our homes. 

Often, we run in and out of stores to get essentials, or eat at a restaurant, and often scurry back home when done.  While this is often the ‘norm’, it’s not supposed to be. The Great Commission (Matthew 28:16-20) relies on us who are Christian to go out and socialize with people in order to share the Gospel message with those who don’t know. God made us to be social, and to share His Word (and when necessary His provisions) with others in our community – our neighbors.

Then there are others among us who are truly alone at home, who unfortunately are perhaps too old to drive, or have no family or friends to go visit or have visiting them.  We have widows, widowers, and singles in our midst, and to expand we have many older empty-nester couples who perhaps stare at each other with nothing to say as there are no outside catalysts to spark conversation or debate.

If you fall into one of those categories, or if you are simply lonely, pick up the phone and talk to someone – one of your sons or daughters, or a neighbor.  The importance of belonging to a church and more importantly a Life Group within your church is that is also a family of fellowship, a group of fellow Believers which individually you (should) be able to talk to anytime about anything.

Or, if you know of someone who is alone, call them even if you’re not alone, to make their day.  What can you talk about?  Start with praising the Lord and share your prayer needs, and go from there…  I am always thankful that I hear from many in my Life Group throughout the week, even if it’s just a quick call to say hello.